Tonight I Sleep

I feel tired. Zonked.

Looming deadlines at work have had me putting in more hours than usual for the past five weeks, with three more to go before all is due. The wedding had us in a crunch these past few weeks to get the invitations out. Both tasks exercise the same, left-brain project planning muscles and the lack of respite has finally caught up with me.

It's time to switch gears.

Tonight I took a break from the to-dos. Tomorrow I will too. I may even paint. Saturday, I may hop a train to Montreal for an Artist Date - a visit to the Montreal Museum of Fine Arts to see the works of Kees van Dongen. I saw his work for the first time on the museum's Web site and I am smitten. The colours, the portraits, the energy... they speak to me so.

It's a four-day weekend and I look forward to some downtime. It's time to refill the well with rest, presence, and a few right-brain treats.

But first things first: tonight I sleep.

Bleh

I have the blahs tonight. Cabin fever. "Le mal de place." Bleh.

I long to escape, to explore and feel the sun on my face. I long to write, to hang out with friends in coffeehouses and throw myself into my creative projects with the abundance and vibrancy of spring! I long to gracefully navigate the contrast between days off filled with creative highs and weekdays that leave me drained after a day's work.

I long to be, without schedule, without obligation.

That's not so much to ask for is it?

Wishing you warmth, sunshine and oodles of goodness,
Steph
xo

ps - This brilliant post by the lovely Jeanine at Wonderings & Wanderings captures it best and gave me a much-needed chuckle. I hope it gives you one too.

Sweet Song

A cardinal sings outside my window this morning. I am delighted.

She puzzled for hours...

... till her puzzler was sore.

Finally! Now that this damn jigsaw puzzle is finished I can get to the rest of the items on that Pondering list of mine.

It is a cool puzzle though don't you think?

I'm such a geek.

Snow

The snow floats down, fluffing the city to death.
Children and those at peace like sails
catch the surge, mastered giggle-like, and roll
into the snow across the wide, wide spaces
white; the wraith - lovely, inscrutable - calls.
Cars begin to sputter and curse; one by one
withered white they die
as buttoned, capped, and booted, you and I
go dancing, tromping, dancing by.
- Snow, by Mark A. Noll

We're getting another six to ten inches of snow today and tonight. D and I took Cassie for a walk after dinner; I definitely tromped. And I felt like dancing. Peaceful.

All Decked Out

D & I all decked out for our night at the National Arts Centre to see the Cos -

isn't that the coolest fedora?

Peace

leaf on my doorstep (Nov. 2007)

I am cocooning. I am sensing a need to slow down, to enjoy my home and its comforts. I am carefully evaluating my commitments and outings, choosing to stay in, lighting candles, writing, connecting - with myself, D., friends, family and the Divine. I am making space. I am creating, cuddling and basking in comfort and Love. I feel at peace.

One More Grateful

This lazy, rainy Saturday. It's 2pm, we just finished our second pot of coffee and we're still in our PJs. I love it!

Grateful Friday

A few things for which I am grateful on this Friday night ...

• good food, good company and good conversation on a girls' night out
• trying bubble tea for the first time (Chocolate Mint latte sans tapioca please!)
• sitting at the beginning of a three-day weekend
• my home
• dinner with friends, laughing until it hurt
• feeling that I have choices in my life, in my outlook, in my career
• trying Rock Band for the first time
• D and Cassie

Till the next time!

Vintage Treats

vintage patterns & transfers

Another year, another Ottawa Vintage Clothing Sale. Purchases this year include:

• two pairs of sheer white gloves - one with tiny black polka dots and another with an argyle design
• one funky orange plastic hand-shaped ring holder with blue flowers and a butterfly
• one silver bracelet with red crystal that perfectly matches the vintage ring I bought last year
• one Irish linen tea towel
• two Simplicity dress patterns from the 1950s, one apron pattern from the 1940s and one package of golden metallic transfer Christmas motifs

Fun, fun, fun!

ps - D. came with me this year. The deal: I paid his entry fee and he'd leave for coffee when he got bored, leaving me to browse to my heart's content. He even managed to find a cool hat before scooting out!

Bits & Pieces

A few random and not-so-random musings ...

~ Fellow blogger comments about the US election and Barack Obama videos brought me to tears this week. Sitting North of the border, I am filled will hope by his words and vision. Yes we all can dammit! I especially enjoyed this behind the scenes video I found at Colors on my mind (approx. 15 minutes).

~ Left brain issue: I am SUCH a productivity geek. I just bought The 4-Hour Workweek and am now engrossed in a book called Getting Things Done, trying to soak it all in before it has to go back to the library. I get all pumped when I read it and before you can say "tickler file" my mind is out of control swirling with projects, to-do's and ideas for home and for work. I need help.

~ Right brain issue: I have so many creative ideas in my head that I don't know what to do with them! You'd think a productivity geek like myself would be able to handle that, non?

~ This week is my first working part-time; I have every Monday off and work an hour less a day. My first Monday at home was anti-climactic: I slept, I surfed, I chatted with Mom on the phone, I ate, I surfed again, I slept again. Not the delightfully creative and homey day I originally envisioned (think Emily Carr meets June Cleaver). I did however spend Tuesday's extra hour painting and that felt gooood.

Ernesto ...

Ernesto

Meet Ernesto, the Cuban philosopher pumpkin (molded by Sartre) that fled Castro's regime to Canada so he could think freely (apparently on our kitchen table).

Sometimes, when it rains on a weekend, D. and I have waaayyyyyy too much time on our hands.

ps - I voted to call the pumpkin Wilbur but D. informed me that Wilbur was a pig. I stand corrected.

Scenes From a Window Bench

Still nursing a cold I haven't been inspired to write much of anything these days, but I did take a few minutes to play with my camera while enjoying a breather in one of my favourite spots: my dining room window bench. Here are a few favourites ...

angled view

reflections

Cassie's dish

focused frame, blurry Cassie

focused Cassie, blurry frame

... with maybe a few more to come in a later post.

Grateful Friday

evening sun in Gananoque town park

A few things for which I am grateful on this sunny Friday:

• the vibrant colours of fall
• having the day off with no plans
• an email from a dear friend sending me strength and love to accompany yesterday's comforts
• a few hours spent working on my creative space in the sunroom
• Squam (yes - still Squam! :)
• an early morning walk and breakfast outing with D.

'Til the next time ...

Fall Comforts

This chickie's been nursing a cold since last week. I think it's progressing, but I thought I'd take some time to mention a few of the fall comforts that help me feel better these days:

• a simmering pot of homemade lentil-veggie soup
• mint tea
• vintage magazines, pretty paper and paints
• short, slow evening walks around the block with D. and Cassie to get a fix of crisp October air
• new blogs and discoveries - see some under (Re)Discovering on your right
• creative ideas and inspiration
• naps
• a favourite book reminding me to live simply
• the warm fuzzy feeling of cocooning on a cool fall night, knowing that there's a full night's sleep ahead of me before tomorrow's workday

I'm off to curl up with my book. See you soon.

More Gratefuls

Just because I feel I need to today ...

• my physical health
• the pork roast waiting to be cooked for dinner tonight
• dinner at a favourite pub last night (The Manx)
• a cozy Saturday night watching From Here to Eternity with D.
• Bridgehead coffee

Grateful Friday

Inspired by Amy and Amy, here's a quick list of things for which I am grateful on this Friday night:

• My new creative space in the sunroom.
• D. and Cassie.
• A newly framed - not to mention stunning - photo of Buddha, given to me by a very talented friend.
• An evening outing at Michael's with Sis.
• My 4-day work weeks starting in November (assuming all the paperwork happens smoothly!).
• Squam, Squam, Squam.

What are you grateful for tonight?

A Catch-up Post

I can't believe it's been almost two weeks since my last post!

The trip to New Brunswick has come and gone. A few highlights include (and there are too many to list here): gabbing with Sis for almost twelve hours on the way there, seeing a childhood friend who now lives in Calgary, DIGGING FRESH POTATOES FROM THE GARDEN, and singing in front of a mic for the first time in 18 years (this summer's Shanghai karaoke incident excepted).

I kid you not, I think digging up those potatoes, washing them and eating them less than an hour later made that trip (no offense Sis!).

The past week was spent gathering last-minute supplies for my workshops at Squam: acrylic paints, rubber stamps, various painting stuffs I've never seen or used before. I'm off to New Hampshire bright & early tomorrow morning. It should be fun!

On a less pleasant note, the past day and half was spent accompanying D. in and out of the emergency room and doctors' offices. Unfortunately he ran into some health issues, but thankfully with good and timely care treatment is under way. He should see improvements within a week.

Et voilà, the past two weeks in a nutshell.

I feel tired from running around and am worried about D. I feel nervous about Squam, but look forward to it too. To alleviate the swirl of emotions, I'm trying to take it one day at a time. Tonight, I sleep. Tomorrow morning, I grab my bags, my coffee, my maps & hit the road to New Hampshire.

I'll see you when I get back.

Grateful

Before I let myself sink into a spiral of dissatisfaction and despair, I will balance out the last few posts about my more challenging dilemmas with a list of things for which I am grateful – no questions asked:

• D. and Cassie
• Family
• Friends
• My home
• My paycheck
• My overall health
• The healthy, organic, abundant food that sustains me
• The creative women bloggers, entrepreneurs, photographers and writers who inspire me – most of them without even knowing it – to grow into my own creativity
• My upcoming trip to NB with Sis
• My upcoming trip to NH for Squam Art Workshops
• My personal library
• My computer
• My car, my mechanic and the fact that I can drive
• The sun, the moon and the stars
• My new digital camera
• That I live in a peaceful country, city, neighbourhood
• Backyard birds – chickadees, cardinals, blue jays
• Hiking trips with D. and Cassie
• My Evil Dead t-shirt, cool skirt and funky bracelet outfit
• My back deck under the trees
• Being walking distance to Bridgehead, the bakery, the florist, the grocery store, the meat shop, the farmer’s market, a favourite sandwich shop and the library
• Saturday coffee and errand runs with D.
• The opportunity to write about how grateful I am, here, today.

Random Accomplishments and Observations

I applied for my passport today; it's been on my to-do list since March 2007. As the teller gave me my receipt, I grinned, leaned in and said "It's my first one, I'm excited."

A young girl on the bus wore a t-shirt that said "Model Citizen" on the front. I thought it was pretty cool. When she got off the bus she threw a piece of paper on the sidewalk and walked away. My illusions were shattered.

I caught my reflection in the door window of an ATM vestibule and noticed I was wearing a deep, sinister frown. There's nothing bad enough going on in my life to warrant that. After that I consciously walked with my eyebrows raised. I preferred looking like an idiot than a grump.

After much - and I mean much - deliberation, I put a digital camera on hold at Future Shop for pickup tonight. I realized that I enjoy doing research for electronics about as much as I enjoy going to the mall. But I am looking forward to my new toy. :)

When I stop trying to control people and situations around me I'm a lot more at peace, and a lot more fun to be around.

When I get my black Jacob cardigan and my black consignment shop sleeveless top dry-cleaned as separate items it costs me $16. When I present them as a sweater set it costs me $10. It really is a nice sweater set.

When I start writing about the price of dry-cleaning, it's time to go. 'Til the next time ...