Fun at the Shanghai

"Oooh we have a karaoke virgin people, be gentle. Be GEN-tullllll..."

And before I knew it I was looking out at a full restaurant belting out Rodgers and Hammerstein's Do, Re, Mi with Lala and China Doll. Oy. I should've known something would happen when Lala and I ordered a bottle of Pinot Grigio instead of a glass of house white each.

To think that I had just been sharing with her that I've been feeling dull and boring lately, like I've lost my edge; that I've been wanting to recapture even a portion of that zest for life I had two years ago when I moved to Elgin Street and spent the summer expanding my comfort zone, trying out new things and letting loose for some fun.

Well last night took care of that.

Do, Re, Mi incident aside, my evening at the Shanghai restaurant was a hoot! The atmosphere was one of family, friends and merriment. The karaoke was just a fluke of good fortune on our part too - someone booked China Doll for a birthday party so Lala and I got a surprise karaoke treat with our dinner! Regular karaoke night is Saturday and you can be sure I'll be checking THAT out.

What an awesome way to kick off a weekend and what an awesome way to tap into that zest for life I know I have in me. I guess it's just a matter of finding opportunities like these to let it out.

Two Sweet Worlds

Just two years ago - almost to the day - I sat out on the patio at my favourite coffee shop writing about how I felt out of place, wondering how I would fit in with the urban crowd. Only a few months in my downtown apartment, freshly on sabbatical, I had no clue what the next year would bring. This afternoon I returned to my old stomping grounds and I've no doubt that I managed to carve myself a place as an urbanite. I felt quite at ease sitting in that same coffee shop rereading my thoughts captured in a spiral notebook that uncertain day.

I miss my old place sometimes. I miss its proximity to the energy of downtown, the patios of Elgin Street and the Canal. Sitting there today felt odd at first, like revisiting a love lost after the break-up, but after the first sip of coffee it felt good.

It's comforting to know that I can go back, get my fix and come home to a place that's different, but just as sweet. I write this post sitting in my shady front porch, enjoying the birds and the breeze. Cassie is curled up at my feet and I look forward to a tasty BBQ dinner of chicken and fresh asparagus with D. It seems like today I get to enjoy the best of two worlds; what more can a girl ask for?

Re-embracing Fitness

Last night I started a new fitness class - the first in over a year.

While on sabbatical I took two dance classes, a Learn-to-Run clinic, tried pole dancing and even threw in a bit of yoga. I was in the best shape of my life. Then I felt a need to reduce my number of commitments and drastically reduced the amount of time dedicated to physical activity.

After spending six months adjusting to being back to work, I finally feel able to incorporate evening commitments into my week without feeling overwhelmed so I signed up for a class. What fun! It felt good to move. It felt good to get lost in the music, feel my muscles tighten and my mood loosen up. And yes my abs hurt but they hurt good!

One baby step at a time, I'm happily re-embracing physical fitness into my life.

A Whole Lotta Goodness

It seems I've been a fairweather blogger lately, but tonight I write. Nothing fancy, I just write. It feels good.

For the first time in about six months, I felt inspired to pack up the ol' laptop and walk to my favourite café. The smell of fresh coffee, sound of background chatter and funky jazz rhythms are invigorating. I feel inspired and alive, and that feels good.

Slowly but surely I'm reincorporating bits & pieces of what made my sabbatical so fulfilling into an everyday life that now includes full time work. It feels good.

Whether it's hanging out at my favourite coffee shop, making myself healthy, wholesome meals or registering for an exercise class, it feels good.

Whether it's sleeping when I'm tired, rediscovering my creativity or taking in the urban vibe, it feels good.

I've pondered my career options, regained interest in local events, sustainability and simple living, and booked time off from work to attend my former Thursday morning writers group. It feels good.

For the first time in several weeks I feel eager to move on, to embrace life and become what I know I can be. And THAT my friends, just for today, feels oh so good.

Meals for You, Meals for Me

At this time last year I was leisurely enjoying the new season, drinking tea and making big pots of homemade soup to share with friends and family for dinner. Now that I'm back at work I have trouble finding the energy to make myself a decent meal, let alone make something that's fit to be shared with company. That's too bad.

I want to give that some thought.

Harder Than I Thought

Going back to work is harder than I thought it would be. For the past week I've been tired, moody and pestered by aches & pains.

Some parts are fun: lunch hour walks with friends, setting up a new office, and the upcoming paycheque on Friday (ok that one is a LOT of fun!). Others are trickier: lack of sleep, figuring out a new system to manage "to do's" between home & work, and reminding myself that I am not my job when I witness negativity and cynicism in the workplace.

There's still a part of me that wants my job and its environment to align with my values and interests. I'm not sure where I am is where it's going to happen, though it might be a stepping stone.

After a year without a salary, I'll admit that the money and benefits are very attractive to me. So just for today, I'll make sure my time is well spent by making that money and those benefits work for me. And just for today, I'll enjoy the friends, the walks and the chance to start anew.

Just Another Monday Night

It's been a mellow day. I wrote, I read, I sipped my coffee. I picked up enough fresh food to keep me fuelled for full work days - I find many small snacks work best. On the menu for tomorrow: salad with roasted chicken breast, organic vanilla yogurt, sliced peaches, walnuts and a Granny Smith apple.

Tonight I listen to the game on CBC.ca. Spezza just scored Ottawa's second goal with less than a minute left in the third. I just finished planting heirloom tomato seeds Mom collected from last year's crop. It was soothing to play in the dirt. The timing falls well; I can watch them grow as I do the same in my new job.

My lunch is ready, I've laid out my clothes for tomorrow and gathered colourful pens, paper clips and sticky notes to fill my cubicle with good cheer. A cold Stella is waiting for me in the fridge. All is good.

Sabbatical Reflections - Part V

I thought I'd spend my last weekend off going out with a bang: dancing at Gracie's on Friday, housecleaning Saturday and a good long hike Sunday. My body said "Not so." Instead I felt achy, tired and sick to my stomach, and for a good portion of the two days experienced shallow breathing and chest pains. Perhaps a bit of back-to-work anxiety? Perhaps indeed.

I'm finally facing the fact that I'm anxious about going back to work. Good. Now I can deal with it.

Sabbatical Reflections - Part IV

I don't wanna go back!!!

I knew this stage would come sooner or later.

Sabbatical Reflections - Part III

As I contemplate my return to work for the federal government, I'm sometimes afraid my level of intolerance for bureaucratic environments full of red tape and CYA tendencies ("Cover Your A--", for the uninitiated) will get the best of me. What if my cynicism takes over again? What if I get caught up in it? What if, in a moment of insanity, I lose it and storm out?

Enter a book by James H. Boren called Fuzzify! Borenwords and Strategies for Bureaucratic Success. How timely! Intrigued by its title and 25 cent price tag, I picked it up.

Boren writes:

"Fuzzify (fuhz'-ih-fy): v. To present information in a manner that seems to be clear and precise but which is characterized by optimal adjustivity of interpretation. ... By fuzzifying, a person can gain acceptance of a statement or set objectives, because others will interpret the fuzzification to mean whatever they want it to mean. ... Fuzzification is particularly useful when the fuzzifier does not know what he is talking about, or when the fuzzifier wants to enunciate a non-position in the form of a position."

Full of such idiotic yet familiar concepts, maybe this book is the comic relief I need to approach my return to work without going insane. Guilty of the odd fuzzification myself, instead of getting frustrated, what better way to embrace it than going in with a sense of humour?

Besides, being in the know may help me avoid impleflopping, incomprehaggles and bladderations. Oh please let there be no bladderations!